“two marmosets, two capuchin monkeys and a cotton-top tamarin”

Five endangered monkeys stolen from France's La Fleche zoo.

“She was wild as a crow to begin with”

Sick monkey goes missing in Northern Ireland.

“12 grapes at midnight”

Güet, gorilla at Spain's Madrid Zoo Aquarium, celebrates his first birthday.

“reportedly made medical history”

Emma, chimpanzee at Edinburgh Zoo, recovers after groundbreaking treatment.

Goodbye, Gregoire

Africa's oldest known chimpanzee dead in his sleep at 66 years.

Stay alive, don't buy Chinese!

Children’s Jewelry Sold Exclusively in Hawaii Recalled by Aloha 808 Trading Due to Risk of Lead Exposure

Hallmark Recalls Jumbo Snow Globes Due to Fire Hazard

Gardener’s Supply Company Recalls Candle-Powered Carousels Due to Fire Hazard

“she had wept softly for what she was leaving behind”

Keepers play matchmaker among the gorillas at Canada's Toronto Zoo.

“reports of nausea and small children crying”

Feeding a gorilla brussell sprouts has unfortunate results, Australian officials say.

“Drunken stupidity would be a good guess”

Minnesota mechanical gorilla reunited with head, two accused.

“drew public attention”

The last of 15 patas monkeys which escaped from FL's Safari Wild earlier this year has been recaptured,and Lex Salisbury, embattled president of Tampa's Lowry Park Zoo, has resigned under a cloud.

Stay alive, don't buy Chinese!

Evenflo Recalls Majestic™ High Chairs Due to Fall and Choking Hazards

“they are just like a little kid”

Nebraska woman choosy about who adopts her monkey.

Stay alive, don't buy Chinese!

Xtreme Toy Zone Recalls Toy Dinosaurs Due to Violation of Lead Paint Standard

and

Regal Lager Recall to Replace Phil & Teds Strollers Due to Fall Hazard

“fighting for her life in hospital”

Northern Irish visitor to African animal sanctuary bitten by monkey, in critical condition with rabies.

“Almasty can bewitch a man”

Pravda reports a yeti outbreak in Northern Caucasus with a sex angle.

“beating him senseless”

British newspaper celebrates Chinese monkey-on-man violence.

“staff were not sure she was pregnant”

Surprise birth at New Zealand's Brooklands Zoo.

“first aid was not there today”

Visitor injured at India's Alipore Zoo when put-upon chimpanzee hurls a rock into the crowd.

“monkey cages built on his property”

Even in the staid world of zoo administration, scandal makes headlines!

“she makes the sound voluntarily”

Orangutan at Great Ape Trust of Iowa teaches herself to whistle.

“natural causes”

Seven wild gorillas dead in the Congo in the last few weeks.

Goodbye, Jenny

41-year-old lemur, one of the oldest in captivity, euthanized after an illness at Florida's Brevard County Zoo.

“South Lakes Wild Animal Park”

30 lemurs dead in Britain park fire.

“a prohibited meat product”

Faced with an airline passenger's packed lunch of three well-done monkeys, a Customs and Border Protection official says

While we in the United States may find the prospect of dining on charred monkey corpses as peculiar, we respect that certain cultures consider this a traditional delicacy...

But they did seize the crunchy snack and turn it over to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

“a repulsive smell, unless you're a gorilla”

New gorilla mom, Monifa, at San Francisco Zoo, is not mothering the infant.

Update: Surrogate mom Bawang seems to be working out fine.

“under her blouse”

"What ya in for, kid?"

"Monkey smuggling." (And disturbing the peace.)

“palm oil is now all the rage”

NYC mayor Nanny Bloomberg bans transfats, orangutans hardest hit!

“breeding and increasing in number”

Up to 20 Tonkin snub-nosed monkeys located in a forest in north-western Vietnam, where they were not known to exit.

“the most friendly apes on the planet”

Baby orangutan at FL's Institute of Greatly Endangered and Rare Species makes a new friend.

“loved to have his armpits scratched”

Titus, 25-year-old golden-crowned sifaka, the last of his kind in captivity(*), dead at Duke Lemur Center after tumor surgery.

(*) That's what the story says, but I begin to believe otherwise!

The story's correct, Duke's been in touch.

Working overtime!

Demo the orangutan impregnates every female orangutan at UK's Paignton Zoo.

Stay alive, don't buy Chinese!

OKK Trading Recalls Toy Army Figures Due to Violation of Lead Paint Standard

“alongside bemused commuters”

Ape-costumed actors make a spectacle of themselves in London as part of Planet of the Apes 40th anniversary.

“equivalent to a 60-year-old human”

Coconuts filled with banana bread on his 30th birthday for silverback gorilla Kakinga at Canada's Calgary Zoo.

“and the World Association of Zoos and Aquariums”

2009: Year of the gorilla, UN declares.