"soy isoflavones can have marked influences on patterns of aggression"

Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center researchers say too much soy turns male monkeys evil. Eviller.

And, Rowland must go.

"it was unlikely 600 were sold to individuals"

600 monkeys reported missing in Serbia. If found, please contact Serbian Chamber of Commerce.

And, Rowland must go.

"she's a first-time mom and the youngest in her family"

Minnesota Zoo gibbon needs parenting classes.

And, Rowland must go.

"I talk to them the way you would talk to a dog"

St Andrews University PhD converses with chimps.

And, Rowland must go.

"pinhead capacitors"

Cell-phones blamed for Congo gorilla deaths.

And, Rowland must go.

Don't use it!

Bushmeat and ape on the hoof in the Congo. Great Ape Survival Project says not to indulge.

And, Rowland must go.

Are you the brain specialist?

Researchers find genes that give humans such freakishly large brains. No word on why many humans are so stupid, for all that.

And, Rowland must go.

"bushmeat can be easily obtained in many communities if you know who is selling it"

Bushmeat in the US, says Pacific News Service. Some recipes.

And, Rowland must go.

"referred to incorrectly as "pygmy" chimpanzees"

Baby bonobo born at San Diego Wild Animal Park.

And, Rowland must go.

"a tree fell against the perimeter of their enclosure"

Eight chimpanzees have brief taste of freedom at Kansas City Zoo. No injuries, human or simian.

And, Rowland must go.

"Agriculture has had a larger environmental impact than any other human activity"

WWF advocates mass starvation, sleeper holds.

And, Rowland must go.

"If it looks exciting enough, then they can come in"

Sydney zoos to install webcams, VPN, encourage staff to work 24x7 from home. Your boss, and mine, watching project intently.

And, Rowland must go.

"clearing of land for farms and pastures also took a toll"

Guerillas responsible for gorilla losses. "The only viable solution to this crisis is the participation of local people in the stewardship of their biological heritage." This will require millions of dollars from the US, it seems.

And, Rowland must go.

"disproving the idea that mammals are born with all the neurons they will ever have"

Princeton prof takes an interest in marmoset brains.

And, Rowland must go.

"a glossy black medium sized monkey with a long tail and white sideburns "

Francois langur monkey born at Belfast Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

"the zoonosis potential"

Avoid exotic pets. You could just, you know, get a nice cat, or dog.

And, Rowland must go.

"a sub-region of the hippocampus called the dentate gyrus"

Rhesus monkeys don't get Alzheimer's, but scientists can at least make them senile.

And, Rowland must go.

"When you keep a monkey as a pet it's not the best thing"

Nemo, an alcoholic seven-month-old South African blue vervet monkey, drying out at World of Birds Wildlife Sanctuary.

And, Rowland must go.

"When I began, there was no need to save the chimps"

Queen of the Chimps Jane Goodall blames world's ills on "our lifestyles, commerce and policies," advocates simple-minded tranzi agenda to school-children who don't know any better.

And, Rowland must go.

"If you've lived alone in a cage for 15 years ... it's a horrifying experience"

Anti-human activists meet at Boston yapfest to trade stories, swear off modern medicine.

And, Rowland must go.

"zoo directors around the country refer to Krantz as a silverback"

Palmer E. 'Satch' Krantz III, director of Riverbanks Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

Let's see: he didn't start from pole, nor lead the race until the first round of stops. Woohoo.

This is what it's come to.

And, Rowland must go.

"It’s a tough world to bring up children in"

Queen of the Chimps Jane Goodall visits New Mexico.

And, Rowland must go.

"the adjacent outdoor gorilla yard also was closed"

Great Ape house at the Washington's National Zoo closed after gorilla twice tests "maybe" for tuberculosis.

And, Rowland must go.

"I had seen animals in zoos and everything"

International Primate Protection League members provide sanctuary for gibbons, wear superhero uniforms sewn by their moms.

And, Rowland must go.

"a medical and technical marvel"

Unhealthy orangutan at Los Angeles Zoo keeps on going.

And, Rowland must go.

"His dad is the No. 1-ranked male"

Ohio's Toledo Zoo has new baby orangutan.

And, Rowland must go.

"Irritation, red rashes and formation of patches"

Outbreak of monkey fever in Bangalore.

And, Rowland must go.

"My son says that he wants to have me studied"

Another fawning paean to Queen of the Chimps Jane Goodall.

And, Rowland must go.

"bury any differences and forge ahead in unity"

Ghana raises money to electrify Nkoranza District, construct clinic for locals, visitors to the monkey sanctuary. Monkeys to be insulated.

And, Rowland must go.

'You are a monkey killer'

Anti-Human thugs at work in the UK, too.

And, Rowland must go.

"Have you heard about the doves of peace?"

Queen of the Chimps Jane Goodall reminds mere hoi polloi that she knows what's best for them.

And, Rowland must go.

Here's good news for Frank J

Philippine scientists report success in breeding monkey-eating eagles.

And, Rowland must go.

"The administration, however, has not done anything yet to help check the monkey terror"

Woman in Patna, India plummets to her death trying to escape monkey attack.

And, Rowland must go.

"may place the zoo's accreditation in jeopardy"

American Zoo and Aquarium Association official threatens Honolulu Zoo over plans to build $200k enclosure for Rusti the orangutan. The lesser quarters he's been in, at the same zoo, for the last seven years raised no eyebrows, apparently, because they're labelled 'temporary.' Somebody's bucking for a career at the State Department, I think.

And, Rowland must go.

"UCLA monkey killer"

Earth First hoodlums vandalize Upton Sinclair house, home of Sumitomo exec Mitchell Lardner. "spray-painted with slurs such as 'puppy killer'. "

"we don't do permanent harm to these animals"

Duke University primate center complains about hatchet job in "The Scientist."

And, Rowland must go.

"the edgy and hilarious Trunk Monkey commercial"

Canadian car dealership to reuse commercial featuring angry chimp.

And, Rowland must go.

"The monkeys causing the biggest problems are believed to have been outcast from their natural families"

Hong Kong to bust troublesome monkeys.

And, Rowland must go.

"The final nail is in the coffin"

Nature reports direct evidence that Oral Polio Vaccine sourced from Kisangani chimps is not the source of HIV.

And, Rowland must go.

"climbers were able to clamber out of the outdoor yard"

The Regenstein Center for African Apes, a $25.7 million project at Chicago's Lincoln Park Zoo needs more work.

And, Rowland must go.

"I didn’t realize what was going on until two weeks ago"

Pampered college students don't want modern medicine for themselves, or for you.

In other news: "Giant Salamander Habitat Found in Heart of Seoul."

And, Rowland must go.

"and the Mole National Park"

Ghana to grow bamboo to pay for conservation.

And, Rowland must go.

"bonobos expected to arrive later in the year"

Iowa Primate Learning Sanctuary announces new director of communications. "Setka's initial duties will include the rollout of a new name and logo for the world-class research center..."

And, Rowland must go.

"Anyone with half-a-brain could smell foul play!"

Shirley McGreal gives the Malaysians a damned good talking to about the Taipeng Four.

And, Rowland must go.

"Getting a callimico display is high on our wish list"

Brookfield Zoo, near Chicago, has great success breeding Callimicos, but does not exhibit them at this time.

And, Rowland must go.

Back, back to the trees!

Center for Public Integrity fears that monkey-cloners may turn to cloning humans.

And, Rowland must go.

"chimpanzees of the Tai forest rain-dance"

Chimpanzee sign language: wiggling hands means "here comes that woman again!"

And, Rowland must go.

"to the day when all chimpanzees are freed from all laboratories everywhere"

New England Anti-Vivisectionists to fete head of Canadian animal sanctuary, renounce modern medicine.

And, Rowland must go.

"South Africa has no native gorillas"

South Africa's National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals demands deportation of Taiping Four.

Update: Pretoria National Zoological Gardens says they're settling in nicely, thanks.

And, Rowland must go.

"Harambi, the gorilla, has always been real partial to me"

Texas woman nurtures apes when apes won't.

And, Rowland must go.

Off-topic

Before it got warm this week, it got foggy:


click for larger version

And, Rowland must go.

"the 30th gorilla born at the zoo"

Western lowland gorilla born at Ohio's Columbus Zoo and Aquarium.

And, Rowland must go.

"Operation Gorilla-Proof"

Omaha's Henry Doorly Zoo tests security of gorilla enclosure by introducing college students into the environment.

And, Rowland must go.

"bonobo chimpanzees can actually speak English"

Asperger's sufferer gets some perspective, of a kind, from spending time with gorillas.

And, Rowland must go.

"The monkey is a bit violent"

India's Thiruvananthapuram Zoo scheduling cataract surgery for two Himalayan bears, a nine-year-old tigress and a 12-year-old lion tailed monkey.

And, Rowland must go.

"His "ultimate goal" is to create a portrait for every ape in every zoo in America"

California artist paints portraits of apes.

And, Rowland must go.

"Planet of the Apes is not very far away"

Editorial in Indian newspaper says lots of monkeys in India.

And, Rowland must go.

"neighbors were concerned about the number of animals"

Elkhart County Board of Zoning Appeals rules against the durned old monkey lady.

And, Rowland must go.

"I wish that it didn't cost that much"

Dallas Zoo to survey the gorilla enclosure.

And, Rowland must go.

Goodbye, Baraka

Brookfield Zoo, in Illinois, loses 13-year-old western lowland gorilla to infection.

And, Rowland must go.

"the Dutch call it a monkey's tail"

There is no Morse code for @. Next month there will be: .--.-., in case you have to send email via Morse or something, I expect.

And, Rowland must go.

"5-year-old Cecil and 6-year-old Kicho"

Cincinatti Zoo introduces two new male gorillas.

And, Rowland must go.

"might explain the biological reason why infant girls tend to learn faster"

Professor Elizabeth Lonsdorf, head of field conservation at Lincoln Park Zoo in Chicago and her colleagues Lynn Eberly and Anne Pusey of the University of Minnesota say female chimpanzees start to fish for termites at a younger age than males.

And, Rowland must go.

"the last two major rivers in China that haven't been dammed"

Chinese premier reportedly to delay drowning of last population of Yunnan snub-nosed monkeys until something else draws attention of journalists.

In unrelated story, China to join multilateral nuke export group, multilaterally export nukes.

And, Rowland must go.

"the county has recommended that Rucker find a place with more room"

Ohio woman's neighbors complain about the dozen capuchin monkeys she keeps in her home.

Update: more.

And, Rowland must go.

"it was clear that we had to have publicity"

Fawning puff-piece about the essential swellness of the Queen of the Chimps.

Money quote: "I think that breaking into labs and taking secret footage and that sort of thing is perfectly fine, but not risking people's lives or threatening them. That only drives things deeper and deeper underground."

Risking people's lives isn't fine because it "drives things deeper and deeper underground." A United Nations Messenger of Peace.

And, Rowland must go.

The Other Other Operation

SC Johnson agrees to give $50k to Conservation International if they promise not to spend it lobbying against SC Johnson.

And, Rowland must go.

"There are currently about 5,000 golden monkeys worldwide"

Twin golden monkeys born at Beijing Safari Park.

And, Rowland must go.

"it's probably a genetic predisposition"

Double cataract surgery for nocturnal douroucoulis at Buffalo Zoo.

Update: more.

And, Rowland must go.

"serious, violent felonies"

ELF thug sentenced to 42 months for part in $200k sabotage spree.

And, Rowland must go.

"would benefit from a bit of tightening"

Voyaging, a dance-theater interpretation of the life of Charles Darwin, opens in Chicago.

And, Rowland must go.

"Apes are much stronger than humans are"

Florida woman runs sanctuary for apes with nowhere else to go.

And, Rowland must go.

"her doctor is not thrilled"

New Hampshire animal trainer losing weight on all-McDonald's diet.

And, Rowland must go.

"Each takes about two years to fully train"

Massachusetts woman raises capuchin monkeys as helpers for paraplegics.

And, Rowland must go.

"Fortunately for her, the Ebola-Reston virus isn't fatal to humans"

Alabama woman outs herself as informant against animal smugglers.

And, Rowland must go.

"deemed an urban menace"

New Delhi authorities seek homes for 240 indigent monkeys nabbed in recent sweeps.

And, Rowland must go.

"five new primate exhibits"

"Gorilla Tropics" exhibit to benefit from Joan Kroc's $10 million bequest to San Diego Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

Google bomb for the common good

Jew.

And, Rowland must go.

"Democratic Registrar of Voters Alice Fortunato said she told Bonoff to get the coat cleaned and bill the city"

Via suburban blight, some people should not be voting. No monkeys were involved.

And, Rowland must go.

You can't cheat an honest man

Today we celebrate the birth of W.C. Fields.

And, Rowland must go.

"what happened has puzzled them"

Singapore Zoological Gardens chimpanzee escapes enclosure, is shot with tranquilizer dart, drowns in reservoir.

And, Rowland must go.

"unnatural social groups"

Whipsnade Wild Animal Park to be protested by litter-happer leafleteers.

And, Rowland must go.

"monkeys breaking bounds from the reserve to feed on bananas laced with gin"

Ghanan monkey poachers attracting monkeys with bananas soaked in cheap booze risk accidentally catching Ted Kennedy.

And, Rowland must go.

"It's vitally important to the community"

ZooCamp at Los Angeles Zoo stymied by city hiring freeze.

And, Rowland must go.

Who could imagine that they would freak out in Kansas?

Man arrested in Salina for stealing monkey-themed T-shirt.

And, Rowland must go.

"It's really important to respect the animals"

Keep your mitts to yourself at St. Louis Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

"investigations were now focusing on a financial motive"

Sao Paolo Zoo to use the buddy system.

And, Rowland must go.

"rewarded by having his back groomed"

This seems like a bad plan.

And, Rowland must go.

"he said he would ask for an extension"

Brazilian police mark time in Sao Paolo Zoo animal deaths.

And, Rowland must go.

"$275 buys you access for one hour"

Visit Bwindi Impenetrable National Park and try to see gorillas.

And, Rowland must go.

Timu... the world's first test-tube gorilla

Omaha's Henry Doorly Zoo set to open new Gorilla Valley habitat on Thursday.

And, Rowland must go.

"It's as safe as we know how"

Kansas's Sedgwick County Zoo seeks to reassure the locals about new gorilla exhibit.

And, Rowland must go.

"I was a naughty boy"

Australian zoo employee on trial after stealing animal bodies for home taxidermy.

And, Rowland must go.

"typically live only 40 to 45 years in the wild and into their mid-50s in captivity"

Cheeta to celebrate 72nd birthday Friday. Nobody thinks to find out if this is really Cheeta, despite how unlikely it seems.

And, Rowland must go.

"Chimps are much better at sniffing things out than we are"

Humans, chimps less alike than you'd think from just looking at the genes, says researcher at Max Planck Institute.

And, Rowland must go.

"has nothing to do with radiation or irradiation processes"

India to get banana juice.

And, Rowland must go.

"the Formula One season's first three races"

It's gonna be a short season and a long year.

And, Rowland must go.

"her disabling motor symptoms of Parkinson's disease are gone"

And again, this is why it's necessary for researchers to do dreadful things to monkeys.

And, Rowland must go.

"The odds against acceptance of the film should have been pretty high"

The Making Of Bigfoot — The Inside Story reviewed.

And, Rowland must go.

1934

It's the Queen of the Chimps's birthday!

Update: She celebrated by haranguing a crowd.

And, Rowland must go.

"since taking the post in January"

New York's Central Park Zoo has a poet in residence.

And, Rowland must go.

"most of the police force didn't see the tape"

Some Dallas police hadn't bothered with the "things to do at the Zoo" training video. Doesn't say how many, or if any of them were involved in the response to Jabari's escape, which'd be important to know.

And, Rowland must go.

"the spirit of speed, strength, agility and selfless service"

Don't forget, Tuesday's the birthday of Hanuman, the monkey god.

And, Rowland must go.

"Zookeepers are still a little unclear about how the monkey escaped"

Squirrel monkey escapes, is recaptured, at Jacksonville Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

"the endangered snow leopard they are adopting"

NJ elementary school students sell each other stuff, donate money to Philadelphia Zoo.

And, Rowland must go.

"monkey meat is believed to be an aphrodisiac"

Monkey poaching reportedly out of control in Central Sulawesi.

And, Rowland must go.

"I was interested in finding out what they were doing with these big brains"

Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology constantly asks do capuchin monkeys have culture?

And, Rowland must go.

"someone is to blame"

Dallas Zoo gorilla rampage victim continues to improve. Lawsuits foreseen.

And, Rowland must go.

"deadline to sign up for the first conference is April 8th"

Upcoming webcast to allow US kids to meet Rwandan gorillas, pygmies. Gorillas get higher billing than pygmies.

And, Rowland must go.

Pig and elephant DNA still won't splice

Fresh from the success sequencing the rat genome, scientists to sequence cow, macaque monkey and sea urchin.

And, Rowland must go.

"I remember a couple of times she was excited she had a date with him"

Witness to Scopes Monkey Trial remembers. Briefly.

And, Rowland must go.

"The exhibit allows the animals to roam"

Omaha's Henry Doorly Zoo adds swinging vines to gorilla exhibit.

And, Rowland must go.

"the visitors to the market and to the hotel were quite amused to witness the scampering by the monkeys"

Monkeys up to no good in Chandigarh, India.

And, Rowland must go.

"if they were monkey skulls I would probably not put them in the sale"

Sotheby's withdraws Borneo carved human skulls from auction.

And, Rowland must go.

"Conservation officers said on Thursday that any damage to the television was not their fault"

Hong Kong woman sues Animal Control for damage done by monkey she says they chased into her apartment.

And, Rowland must go.

"I've seen endangered frog sperm under a microscope"

Tennessee couple donates to conservation, volunteers at zoo, covers every square inch of home with cultural, animal, themes.

And, Rowland must go.