“offering an unspecified reward”

Wife of St. James Davis, chimpanzee-attack survivor, suffers purse-snatching.

Cercopithecus ascanius

Houston Zoo hosts a new baby Schmidt's red tailed guenon. A picture is included.

“both a tiger and a lemur contained in the same body”

Canada's Edmonton Journal says China doesn't deserve the Olympics. MonkeyWatch agrees.

“funded by the National Eye Institute”

University of Washington may be dunned for unapproved surgical procedures done on monkeys.

“a patas monkey and a ring-tailed lemur”

Two primate births at Phoenix Arizona's Wildlife World Zoo.

“writing his autobiography”

The oldest known living chimpanzee, Tarzan's Cheeta, turns 76 years old.

Update: More from UPI on the autobiography.

“an empty moat around their home”

Disaster narrowly averted at San Francisco's Chaffee Zoo.

“the staff of five that tends to the senior primates”

Much like the rest of us, the gorillas at Louisville Zoo’s Gorilla Forest grow older.

Update: Philadelphia Zoo says "Me too".

“How many Texas towns have monkey massacres?”

Murals of the Johnson Creek Monkey Massacre and other moments of Arlington, TX, history called for.

“untarnished”

Former Chimp Haven employee drops lawsuit.

So boycott 'em

If they're not murdering Tibetans, they're tainting your children's toys with lead.

“the wild world of animal control”

The Kitsap, WA.,dog-catcher remembers the day he got “a report of a monkey loose on Bainbridge Island.”

Daily New York scandal

New York's breath-of-bresh-air Governor a dope fiend! (h/t Scared Monkeys)

“highly trained monkeys”

Google-owned YouTube found to have new motto: Be evil, but blame monkeys.

“authentic experiences”

Swimming with sharks, gorilla trekking among guerillas, shopping the souk in terrorist country: adventure holidays for the unconcerned.

“kicked out of and beaten up by a colony elsewhere”

Zoo of Acadiana in Louisiana includes lemurs among its new births.

That makes all the difference, I guess

At least when the current Governor of New York pays for his girlfriends with public funds she's an amateur, not as with the previous Governor.

“including Australopithecus”

You gotta crawl before you can walk, 6 million years ago.

“as was George Bush”

An Obamamessiah-worshipper considers Hillary as a monkey trapped in a monkey-trap.

Daily New York scandal

I'm shocked! New York's new Governor spent campaign funds on Miss Sleepover? Where'd he learn a trick like that?

“executions”

Arrest made in Congo over 2007 gorilla killings at Virunga.

“concerned over his interaction with state officials”

Connecticut mocked by surrounding states for former Governor Rowland's asexual scandal.

“clothed in nappies”

Keeping tidy while fostering an abandoned gorilla.

“speciesist”

Animal rights arson. Fun & games for the anarchist set.

Lie down with democrats...

Who expected anything else?

Update: Oh yeah, didn't see that coming.

“frivolous subhumans”

A “group of leading scientists&rdquo seeks to ban chimpanzees from New Zealand TV advertising.

“David Paterson was sworn in today”

Out with the bad air, in with the good.

New York held hostage, day 8

Could a career in assertiveness training lie ahead?

New York held hostage, day 7

Just a week of Republican schadenfreude!

New York held hostage, day 6

This is only the beginning...

It's that time again

Eat a Tasty Animal for PETA (IEATAPETA) Day: the happiest day of the year!

New York held hostage, day 5

Hunt on for naked pics of Dupre.

New York held hostage, day 4

Limousine liberal Muttawah vows vengeance, impotently.

“Counselors have been sent”

Escaped chimpanzee shot dead in Texas.

“devoid of toads, salamanders, or newts”

“When the public thinks of Madagascar's fauna most likely they think of one of the fifty species of lemur.” If Dr. Franco Andreone has his way, soon they'll have frogs on their minds.

Not 'Til He's Good & Ready!

NY's long nightmare continues, Super-Delegate Spitzer to continue bareback ride until Monday.

“one foolproof way”

Washington's bitey monkey's rabies test: negative.

New York held hostage, day 3

Spitzer-palooza continues.

“modern pygmies”

'Hobbit' battle continues to rage.

New York held hostage, day 2

Arbiter of all morality still retains office.

Update: Looking to secure his legacy, plus owed one on the fleet plan.

“may have to be put down”

Bitey monkey in Washington may have Herpes B.

Update: Bad news for the monkey.

More: Not without a fight.

For the Love of God, Montressor!

Walls raised higher at San Francisco Zoo's Gorilla World.

“We are thrilled and relieved”

AZA OK's NC's Natural Science Center.

a Malagasy name for "prize"

Philadelphia Zoo's baby sifaka gets a name.

iPhone

Ballmer reprises monkey boy.

“She's kinda like a 75- [or] 80-year-old woman”

HIPAA doesn't apply to gorillas, so here's more than we want to know about Tino's ovarian cancer surgery.

Allegedly...

Monkeys in Florida Get High on Millipede Hallucinogen.

“popular with children”

Brain-damaged capuchin monkey wants special attention in New Zealand.

Update: Protests ensue!

Miniature Monkey News Roundup

Tiny fossil monkey found in Mississippi, tiny live monkey born in Britain.

“a wee monkeylike adult creature”

A New York Times reader of 55.8 million years ago.

“I’m not really sure how they handle a monkey bite”

Arizona boy savaged by pet lemur.

“Stoned Apes”

Those wacky hippies and the things they believe.