If it's not you that stinks, and it's not me that stinks...

Reports of skunk ape in Tennessee bring skunk ape-seeking tourism to Tennessee.

Philippine monkey-eating eagle is the country’s national bird

"The Philippine eagle feeds on flying lemurs, squirrels, snakes, civet cats, hornbills, bats, and monkeys." And Lileks buys cebus for them?

"and then the monster simply disappeared"

"Professional" "ghost" "buster" (look ma, I'm Reuters) complains job not as glamorous as seen on TV.

"there is no such science as hominology"

Tibetan source relays Moscow News article on Yeti. Or Meti.

Dispatch from the Phillipines

Piglet born with face of monkey

Advance warning

Queen of the Chimps to visit Children's Conference on the Environment at Connecticut College next July. Don't believe what she says, kids.

Nawww, it's a plant that looks like an Orangutan hand

Oregon exotic plant dealer charged with selling Orangutan parts, etc.

Hey kid, monkeys eat paste

Colorado 5-year old thinks he's a monkey, climbs tree.

"We don’t care if it’s a snake or a gorilla"

Illinois sheriff takes control of local Animal Control facility, announces moratorium on euthanasia.

When headlines and stories collide

OK, so how much of this article is really about "Outlawed pets for sale on 'net"?

How about arboreal jellyfish?

Illinois columnist calls for ideas for tourist-attracting alternative to bigfoot.

Ook ook yourself. Now curtsy!

Queen of the Chimps on Queen's birthday honors list.

'Cause fiberglass cows are so, ya know, done

Indiana countryside littered with fiberglass chimps

"researchers were successful in training the females to dispense urine samples"

San Diego Zoo touts success in lion-tailed macaque reproduction effort.

Well, this could be fun

French scientist speculates that Myanmar fossil may be footbone from common ancestor of all anthropoids. Leakey clan calling in favors.

Update: more

New Age Orangutan

Denver zookeeper/aromatherapist stinks up the monkeyhouse.

"This man is a menace to the world"

Unemployed Saddam hireling mocks his betters.

Repeat offender

Kansas trucker cited (hire a copy editor) for animal neglect, again, for keeping chimp caged in parked semi cab.

Trail of evidence

University of Tennessee researcher to test Mystery Dung.

Game Preserves being used as hunting grounds

Bushmeat crisis stories from Congo and Kenya.

It's two, two, two columns in one

Is it news, or is it unpaid advertising for Orangutan Appeal UK?

Who'd he call?

Monkey steals cell-phone from visitor to Chinese zoo.

"She greeted the crowd with an authentic chimpanzee call"

Queen of the Chimps amuses Florida college crowd with party tricks, calls for fuzzy-minded one-worldism.

"we come across some strange hairs, and a pile of dry dung"

Writer goes exploring in Uganda, learns about empty lake, empty caves, and gorillas he missed seeing by a few days.

Ooh, Bei Bei

China unveils mascot and logo for the 2004 Asian Cup.

'Cause sharing office space with the gorilla was getting old.

New digs planned for Dubai Zoo.

Kids, be careful. UK police confirm:

You are not Tarzan. (Also, don't play with grand-dad's forklift.)

Mark, Mark, they're conducting horrible medical experiments!

Canadian researchers to conduct monkey trials of prospective SARS vaccine this fall. That's, like, in a year? This is news?

"We are definitely one of the leading groups. I don't want to say we'll be the first, but we're definitely the leading edge." Somebody look at me!!!

“If the lemur jumps on Dave’s head, that’s good entertainment”

Iowa's Niabi Zoo to provide talent for Jack Hanna's Nov. 12 Letterman appearance.

Nosey!

Australian travel agents on busman's holiday to Brunei. A monkey is expected to be seen.

I thought you said Shave the Gorilla. Never mind.

Via A Small Victory, Adam Ant sings about Gorillas

'Cause the apes in Torquay are so common

Suffolk woman raises £2,740 for the Orangutan Foundation UK, is rewarded with a week with the apes in Borneo.

"Placyk will collect feces and hair samples"

University of Tennessee biologist uses logic, common sense to address local mystery ape questions, hedges bets.

"the ape was very weak when it was born"

Fresno's Chaffee Zoo gets a new baby gibbon.

A conversation piece, I guess

"What the hell is that thing?"

"Why, that's my orangutan skull. Like it?"

"Ummm"

David Attenborough gets a fleet rate

Uganda considers raising ticket price to track chimps.

$4 million during the next few years

Duke University to better accommodate monkeys.

The red mouth ought to be a dead giveaway!

Madhya Pradesh, India betel-nut dealers plagued troubled by violent, thieving addicted monkey.

Paging Mr. Santayana, Mr. George Santayana

Franklin Park Zoo plans further escapades of Little Joe.

Scrum this!

English rugby player writes "what I did on my summer vacation" travel column about trip to Grenada, finds room to badmouth US, President Reagan.

With a photo that isn't it!

Whether or not it's a now recaptured pet, publicity-seeking nutjob who hasn't seen it declares the Tennessee critter to be a skunk ape.

State of Washington puts more chimps on welfare

Cle Elum to host Chimpanzee Retirement Sanctuary Northwest

"Deputies plan to interview the man to make sure that his monkey was the one on the loose"

Tennessee mystery creature may be this escapee, now recaptured.

Tranzi reign of terror to visit Boca Raton

Queen of the Chimps uses foundation-funded celebrity to blame all world's problems on humans, Western culture. "If everybody acquired the standard of living the average American has, we'd need four more planets."

monkey population on course to outnumber humans

Indian state of Himachal Pradesh plans to sterilize teeming "delinquent" wild urban monkeys.

"It's probably a big dog"

Rural Pennsylvanians have been reporting a mysterious escapee, mothman, or chimera for years. And still are.

little Mogly

German escapee captured in Bremen old people's home.

"Neither department had a tranquilizer gun"

More local coverage of Stamford, CT chimp.

Update: more. Note to UT Veterinary School primate expert Dr. Edward Ramsey, quoted in previous post: "Travis runs his own bath water and prefers ice cream, wine from a tall-stemmed glass and filet mignon over bananas." Herbivorous, my ass.

"Virtually every primate is herbivorous"

Expert who hasn't seen it declares Tennessee escapee probably not a chimp, probably not killing cats.
"Odds are, if it killed anything, I don't think it would kill many and it wouldn't kill repeatedly."

Update: A more excitable take on things.

Another thought: Dr Instapundit and Mr. Hyde?

"It also fails the laugh test"

Money-hungry treehuggers report they're confused, frightened by proposed changes to endangered species importation policy, insist only the only thing that can work is more of what hasn't worked.

"I've been to the zoo, but I never thought I'd be chased down the street in Stamford"

Connecticut escapee gives Stamford cops a hard time, is recaptured.

Update: Brief local story with small blurry photo of the entertainment as it occurred.

figuring out how to keep the brain under control

New Haven columnist concerned about implications of Duke robo-monkeys

Linkage

More Monkey-related items added to the permalinks at right.

Somebody sure cut through that fence, all right

Mighty Joe Young's bastard spinoff Valley of Gwangi on DVD.

"I smelled that smell and saw that monkey"

Tennessee escapee on terror spree.

"The lady who ran the place ended up being insane"

OSU junior visits South Africa, confirms what he's been taught to expect.

Soon Bonzo, soon, the world will be ours

Queen of the Chimps continues to use her fame to advocate anti-human tranzi agenda.

Barn door, horse, etc.

Franklin Park Zoo investigating. Jack-booted Agriculture Dept thugs on the case, too. State cops want their own tranquilizer guns, Teddy nervous.

Update: Red Sox to offer manager spot to Little Joe

"planned march through the ancient, monkey-infested town"

Reuters thinks Indian muslims are endangered by Hindus. Cause Islam's the Religion of Peace and such, ya know.

"We don't want any trouble but if there is any violence against us, we may not be able to control retaliation by misguided Muslims,'' Maulana Musannah Miyan, a leading Muslim cleric told a news conference in the city.

I see nothing, nothing!

The wait pays off for gorilla photographer Schulz. (He took a picture of one, not he is one.) (If he is, it doesn't say so.)

Update: another story, this one with the photo.

Oh yeah, the monkey

Remains of long-missing squirrel monkey found in former Kresges in British Columbia.

Coltan, a rare metal used in manufacturing cellphones

Diane Fossey Gorilla Fund says Emmerson Mngangagwa, possible successor to Robert Mugabe, involved in Congo mineral trade, gorilla killing.

Cause who wants to work with live animals, now?

Will Ferrell to voice The Man in the Yellow Hat in upcoming animated feature of Curious George.

Good News for Monkeys

Thailand to Process Bananas in Mbarara

Maybe you could volunteer to take their place, Sunbeam

Alaskan PETA-wannabe can't find anything local to whine about, complains about a chimp in Nevada.

What's your major?

University of Louisiana-Monroe biology major researching whether monkeys learn by watching each other.

A common mistake

"The last time the town of Hartlepool had that many people at a public event was when they unceremoniously hung a monkey because they thought it was a French spy."

I cannot see, look out for me!

Australian scientists hard at work replacing contents of monkey's lens with silicon-based gel. "It will totally change ophthalmic surgery, if we can get it right."

"It's a nice step towards applying this in humans"

Texas scientists transplant ovary into sterile monkey, harvest egg to produce test-tube monkey.

"she controlled the robot arm using only her brain and visual feedback"

Researcher implants monkey so it can play video game without moving.

Canadian Ape

Calgary Zoo touts gorilla exhibit

Ook, ook

Researchers discover that genetic defectives have trouble speaking, invite reporters in.

George Bush bad, scary. Ook.

Queen of the Chimps unmasks, leaves steaming pile of lefty elitism.

Update: "We must not sit still and do nothing." Watch the trees, keep watching the trees.

Monkey Mikey

On the Fritz notes something about the big fibber.

"hot chilli soup with gorilla flesh"

"Monkey meat is real tasty especially if fried well with tomatoes, onions and some garlic.”

"We found a flag pole and a monkey head"

Kids cleaning the river bank in Johnson City, NY find something nasty.

Toonces got nothing on this, baby!

"St. Louis Zoo taught a monkey to master a driving course"

That ought to make for a pleasant lunch

SHARE Home School Group will have a park day at Community Park near the gorilla cage area. Evolving not permitted.

Your Tax Dollars at Work

NSF Funds Study to Simulate Primate Chewing.

No running, kids!

American military base in Japan to remove “Monkey Mountain” from their elementary school playground since it's too dangerous under wussy new rules.

"Kofi Annan appointed Goodall as Messenger of Peace"

Queen of the Chimps takes time from her busy schedule to help indocrinate future Tranzis.

What, no elephant dung?

German "artist" to add gorilla corpse to exhibit of preserved bodies of humans, animals. "Now in Hamburg, it has had long runs in Germany and London, has toured in several countries and more than nine million people have visited it."

There's a Grey-shanked Douc?

Obscure primates face extinction

What are you looking at?

A Western lowland gorilla from Bristol Zoo that has had cataracts since birth has regained full sight following two groundbreaking operations.

What about the Burrowing parrots?

Gorillas are conservation's poster child, but you should feel guilty for not contributing to uglier animals, too.

Bwindi Tourist Visits Up Since May 2000

"Tourist visits to the park dropped sharply after Interahamwe militia attacked Bwindi in March 1999 and killed eight foreign tourists and a park warden." Well, yeah.

Ero primo

Italian mountaineer says he declared that the yeti is really a brown bear before Japanese alpinist did.

You suspected it, didn't you?

Monkeys are laughing at us!

Monkeys on the Web

Via Tim Blair, Famous Monkeys Through History.

And you thought gorillas could be dangerous!

The Department of Agriculture is "investigating the Franklin Park Zoo for possible violations of the animal welfare act."

Sustainable popcorn

Toronto International Environmental Film and Video Festival

The horror

Six people arrested in central Vietnam for killing four endangered monkeys face up to seven years in prison. "A local forest ranger said they were carrying three Phayre's Leaf-monkeys and a Douc Langur monkey as well as a number of weapons and the frozen carcass of a wild boar."

Oh, Drama!

Alaskan high-schooler visits Rwanda, sneaks up on gorillas.

A nice scientist-to-gorilla ratio

"A team of 100 African scientists is counting rare mountain gorillas living in the range straddling Congo, Rwanda and Uganda." "There are believed to be about 670 mountain gorillas living in the wild..."

Update: They'll be counting nests because it's "very difficult to count wild gorillas."

"Animal rights protestors will make their presence felt tomorrow"

Glaziers near Cambridge University expect a windfall.

Then we can just sit back and clip coupons!

Louisiana researcher has monkeys teaching monkeys.

Don't Tell Eisner!

Queen of the Chimps is against chimps in show-biz.

"The Great Conservancy"

Kenya ponders a controversial land grab.

German film researcher interviews retired Hollywood chimp

Cheeta gets visitors.

"No one wants to have a gorilla escape"

Boston Globe reports that Little Joe's flight from Franklin Park Zoo isn't helping Zoo New England's quest for a plusher seat at the tax trough, and that they may be forced to buck up their notably poor attempts to find private money or even do something about controlling costs.

Just Cross to the Other Side of the Street

Another Malaysian youngster suffers a monkey attack.

"looking for donor agencies"

"Project Primate," launched by India's Tripura State, purports to help conserve some fairly obscure primate species.

A little less "self-esteem", a little more "learn to read"

Queen of the chimps teaches Delaware tykes to speak chimp.

Goodbye, Rocky

Arkansas Little Rock Zoo gorilla dead after anesthesitized routine exam.

Well I'll be an Armadillo's Uncle!

Humans share near-identical uninitialized code patch areas with all sorts of critters.

Oh to be in Fresno, now that the Big Fresno Fair's come!

Next year, Poultry & Fowl, this year a diapered capuchin and various other rainforest denizens, diaper status not mentioned.

"It was so not computing."

Vermont wonders "guy in gorilla suit" or "sasquatch"?

Well, who could have predicted that?

New TV Tarzan panned.

"your people will enjoy gorilla viewing which will animate you"

China "gives" Uganda $3.8 million, Uganda promises gorilla watching opportunities.

Gravity's just a theory, too

Minnesota pols look to mandate creationism in the schools.

Someone's tempting fate

Everest climbers visit Boudanath Stupa, belittle Monkey Temple.

Survivors of Lemuria

The Cheese Stands Alone on lemurs.

Painting chimp honored with sculpture

"Sammy, a 25-year-old resident of South Bend's Potawatomi Zoo, has been painting, off and on for the past seven years." As part of their Celebrate the Chimps project, the Zoo commissioned dozens of sculptures of chimps. This one is supposed to be Sammy.

This story includes one of the chimp's works.

Decatur, beware!

Apparent escapee spotted in Arkansas.

"She's our hero"

Queen of the chimps lies about D.U.. asks that attention be diverted from fighting terrorism.

I'd rather die

PETA-symp UK columnist against monkeys in medical research

Gorillas for me but not for thee

PETA-symp Boston columnist wants Little Joe set free.