Thursday, December 28, 2006

But it does repeat on ya!

Cloned meat and milk to be declared safe by FDA.

“The monkeys fought back”

Texas pets, Opie and another monkey, tortured during home burglary.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

“Wah, wow, hoo!”

Beware the plaintive song of the gibbon.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

“That would include zookeepers”

Canada says “no thanks” to blood donations from professional monkey-handlers

Friday, December 22, 2006

“given a fertility drug”

MSM's failure to respect gorilla's privacy.

“Roots and Shoots youth leaders”

Worldwide Youth Network Raises $40,000 to Help Orphan Chimpanzees in Africa&rdquo: we've been doing a first-class job orphaning chimpanzees without your help, thanks just the same!

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

“monkey cloning is important”

If South Korea suffers a monkey shortage, science will be ready to help.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Thursday, December 14, 2006

“bombs away”

The habits of various animals disposing of their dung is considered.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

“prosimians, not monkeys”

December 14 is officially Monkey Day!

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

and what about George Allen?

PETA demands ban on ownership of “macaca” monkeys in Wayne County, North Carolina, because of herpes B danger.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Sunday, December 10, 2006

“a happy day”

Amazing Animal Productions Inc chimpanzees to retire, to acclaim of animal rights pressure group and tame primatologists, who continue to pay undergraduates with Primate Chow and fish-sticks.

Saturday, December 09, 2006

“more than a million years younger than earlier estimates”

“Little Foot” Australopithecine not human ancestor, scientist says.

Even the weather report is biased extreme left!

I wonder why this editorial isn't signed. Fear of having to stand behind it someday?


Michael Crichton's latest novel Next and its orangutan narrator declared politically unsound due to previous novel, State of Fear's, failure to endorse global warming.

Update: Senators Rockefeller and Snowe to sponsor heresy trials.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

“one of Africa’s last great untouched wildernesses”

Christmas vacation anong the chimpanzees in the National Park in Gabon.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

“elephants, hyenas and baboons have wreaked havoc”

Life worsens for Kenya villagers.

“government debacles”

Rep. Henry Waxman (D-CA), rooting for truffles, Joe Lieberman (I-CT), not as harmless as he looks: politicos to watch in the coming year.

Friday, December 01, 2006

“But he was a fun drunk”

You'll have to aim low if you mean to spit back at Danny DeVito.

Update: George Clooney trots the chunder trail with Danny in impression of F. Scott and Zelda.

“whether you are descended from a Rhesus monkey, or just a plain Chimp”

Australia's man on the street.